Dressing for a Changing Body on a Low Buy
Did I set myself up for failure?
This year I decided to do a low buy of 20 items including replacements, but not jewellery, accessories and active wear.
I had done what I consider a successful low buy in 2024 with a goal of 20 items - I ended up buying 22. The reason I originally settled on 20 items, was that for me, a comfortable sized wardrobe is about 100 items (not including jewellery, accessories, base layers and activewear). I wanted my items to last me 5 years, so 100 divided by 5 ended up being 20 items per year.
Contrary to 2024 I didn’t include accessories for 2025 as I knew I would have to replace some items that had gotten worn out or were too small. So my goal for 2025 was to limit myself to 12 new items and 8 replacements. In 2024 I had bought 3 accessories, as well as a lot of summer clothes including a fantasy purchase for a vacation, so I felt that if I was dilligent I could stick to the 20 pieces.
Well, now 3 months into 2025 I’m starting to feel like I might have set myself up for failure if I strictly stick to those rules.
A major reason for this is that my body has changed more than I expected, and a lot of things just don’t fit right anymore. Some parts of my body have gotten softer and others more muscular. I’m working out and swimming more, so my already broad shoulders have gotten even broader and my back muscles have become more developed. This means that a lot of jackets and shirts simply don’t fit comfortably. My quads and glutes also have gotten bigger, so many pants don’t fit in the way I want them to. Combine that with minor weight fluctuations that each time has left my body with a slightly different shape as well as a stomach that has developed a tendency to heavily bloat.
Another reason is that not all clothing is going to last 5 years. Even when you try to buy good quality, some things get worn out more quickly. Other pieces of clothing get torn or destroyed by accident. I’ve also seem to have developed wool sensitivity on my neck, so no woolen turtlenecks or crew necks for me.
And then a few things simply don’t feel like me anymore and represent a past version of me.
I didn’t come into my first low buy from a place of excessive overconsumption, so I don’t have what I would call a huge wardrobe. My wardrobe app tells me that I at the moment have about 65 items of clothing and 20 pairs of shoes excluding activewear, baselayers, underwear and accessories. This is after decluttering some items that were clearly worn out or too small. I don’t know if this is a lot or not living in a four seasons climate.
About 20-30%1 of my closet or more fall in one of the above categories: Too small, too worn out or not my style, with the first category accounting for the biggest number. We are talking jeans, trousers, jackets, shirts, active wear and even underwear. Some things still “work” but are on the cusp of being too tight and aren’t really comfortable. I’ve ended up leaving the house in clothes that made me feeling so mentally uncomfortable that I just wanted to hide and go home as soon as possible.
Although some of these items aren’t things I wear in my daily life like the jumpsuit I only wore 6 times, others are true staples like my black jeans (110 wears in two years) or my striped shirt (78 wears in two years). Even with that in mind, it’s no wonder that I sometimes struggle to get dressed. Especially my early spring wardrobe is challenged, but I hope late spring and summer will be easier as less layering is needed.
20-30% adds up to far more than the 8 replacements I originally planned to buy and probably also more than the 20 pieces in total for the whole year. Sticking to 8 replacements seems a bit unrealistic now.
Whether on a low buy or when trying to be more mindful in our clothing consumption it’s easy to feel guilty about having to buy more clothing due to a changing body than you originally planned to. But our bodies will change throughout our lives whether caused by weight loss or gain, pregnancy, age, working out, sickness and a million other reasons as well as throughout the month or the day depending on our period, bloating etc.
When I open my closet and am reminded that the clothes hanging there will bring me the aforementioned discomfort, I feel defeated. I feel frustrated and confused about why I can’t find something to wear. I feel grief about the clothes that I love that I can no longer wear. I feel bad about myself. The effects of all of those feelings are that my day starts out on a negative note. That negativity goes far beyond my clothes and carries through to many areas of my life.
- Dacy Gillespie
I’m sad and quite frustrated that I can’t wear my loved clothing anymore and also feel bad about having to buy more - due to environmental concerns, maybe having to break my low buy which kind of feel like breaking a promise to myself, or even that little annoying voice in my head that whispers You could have done more - more exercise, less snacking.
Yes, it would serve the environment if I kept from buying clothes, but is serving me and my wellbeing? Would I be punishing my body for getting stronger and for changing in general? That I keep tucking on tight necklines or feel restricted when reaching for things? That pants fit so tightly across my stomach that I want to open a button when sitting down? Who’s that good for?
Illfitting clothes aren’t going to do any good for my emotional wellbeing and confidence in general. As someone who didn’t learn to swim properly until in my 30s I’m proud that I’m now able to swim 1000 meters. I don’t want to punish my body for getting stronger or for changing due to age, life etc. I can sometimes yearn for a thinner body, but I’m also happy and grateful where I am today, the experience I’ve accumulated, the ups and downs my body has carried me through. Those changes are reflected in how my body is shaped. As Xue write it in her brilliant article Dressing for an Imperfect Body:
I want my clothes to work for me, not against me. To honor the life I’ve lived, not punish me for the changes it’s brought. And that means forgiving myself, even on the days I still ache for the impossible. […] Here’s to dressing for the body I have today—the imperfect, glorious, ever-changing body that’s still mine.
One of the main reasons for doing a so-called low buy was to have a curated wardrobe that serves me and not contribute unnessessarily to the overproduction of clothes. But an illfitting and worn out wardrobe isn’t serving me.
To paraphrase Dacy Gillespie, I deserve clothes that fit. Clothes that suit my body in its current shape and form, not clothes that make me feel constricted or as if I ought to be a different shape. Clothes influence our mood and how we feel about ourselves. I want to feel good about myself.
Yes, I could probably get by with a smaller wardrobe - I know a lot people do that - either by choice or necessity. And as I don’t want or am able to replace everything immediately, I will have to get by with a smaller wardrobe at the moment. I might not even need as much as I think. I want to make thoughtful purchases that fit my style in order to create a curated wardrobe. Maybe this can also be seen as an opportunity - not to reinvent my style completely - but to acquire pieces that feel like me and reflect my current style. I’m looking for the right items although some placeholders might sneak their way in for more urgent needs. I’ll try to prioritise what truly doesn’t fit and mainly focus on the season I’m in and the gaps I’m experiencing right now as mentioned in last week’s post.
My low buy rules were set in order to encourage mindful consumption and being able to spend more on other things I value like travel. But I also value feeling good in my body and being able to go through my day without being uncomfortable - whether that’s physically or emotionally. I want to be able to go for a walk without having to wear clothes that are either too small or have holes in them. I want to be able to get dressed for my daily activities without agonizing about what to wear.
I’m feeling like my low buy rules no longer serve me and am considering adjusting them. I’m unsure what would be the best way and would love your opinion:
Option 1A: Removing the limit on replacements and keep to 12 new items for the year. I have definitely been overthinking some replacements and have been holding back from getting them due to this rule. Sometimes though it can be hard to determine if an item is a replacement or not. Should it be a direct replacement like “washed black jeans” or more a replacement of the function “sturdy pants that can be worn casually and dressed up”? What if buying a direct replacement isn’t what I’ll get the most use out of?
Option 1B: A variation of this inspired by Gillian from Uncomplicated Spaces could be to stick to 20 items for the year and not counting replacements towards that number. This is something I expect to be able to stick to. But as I need quite a few replacements, I don’t know if this any longer would be a low buy in reality.
Option 2: Stop distinguishing between new and replacement items, and allowing myself 20 items for the year. I’ve only bought 5 items for Q1, so theoretically I should be able to limit myself to 20… I suspect this could keep me from buying things that I actually need, so is this the way forward?
Option 3: Forget about the low buy. Maybe this year just isn’t the right time for a low buy, but as mentioned this feels a bit like breaking a promise to myself.
Or do you have another suggestion?
I’m left wondering:
Will replacements be the right thing to add? Do I even know what I want to replace too small items with or has my style and preferences changed along with my body? If I find something that’s a perfect fit for my wardrobe but not an urgent need, should I buy it or focus on the needs?
Can what I’m doing at this point even be considered a “low buy” when I might have to replace more than 20 pieces? Do we have a skewed picture of what normal consumption even is?
How do you balance consuming mindfully and still having clothes that fit when your body changes? Is it even a contradiction?
I don’t have the answers to these questions or how to continue my low buy, but I do know that I don’t want to overconsume, but I also don’t want to punish my body for changing. I deserve clothes that fit!
Would love to hear your thoughts on the above questions. If you have gone through a change whether physical or mental, how did you handle dressing for that change?
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I’m aware that a lot of people have gone through even more drastic body changes, and I acknowledge that as a straight sized person I’m still privileged when it comes to clothes shopping.
I feel you so much...I was in the same place a few years ago and it was a very confusing time - why has my style changed? what fits? what styles am I into now? secondhand or new? am i bad for buying from fast fashion brands? what if my body continues to change?
Interestingly, once I told myself I could buy whatever I wanted to fit my changed body, I suddenly became about 100x pickier. My mind wasn't focused on "am I a bad person for shopping", it was focused on whether I could find the right clothes I needed, and it turns out I don't like about 90% of the things out there anyway. I think giving ourselves the permission to shop won't necessarily turn us into ravenous consumers if we know why we're doing it in the first place.
I ended up buying 4 pairs of trousers that year (2023), which felt excessive at the time but they're now the foundation of my everyday dress: I've hit over 95 wears for two of them, and 55 and 34 wears respectively for the other two. I think these are good outcomes!
I’m reminded of a phrase used by Shawna Ripari on YouTube, I believe re: no/low buys, and that’s keeping an eye on whether your actions “follow the spirit of the law rather than the letter of the law.” I wish I could find when she discussed this but I couldn’t (she’s quite prolific!), so hopefully the gist of it comes through. It seems to me that, as long as you stay within the “why” of your low buy (which is probably not feeling like you’re punishing your body for changing, but rather adopting a slower, more mindful, more considered approach to shopping), you’re still on a successful low buy.
Cheering you on regardless of the outcomes!!